‎”There’s a crack, a crack in everything. That is how the light gets in.” ~ Leonard Cohen

Yom Kippur this year was absolutely amazing! The whole weekend was spent in a state of meditation, prayer, chanting, singing and reflection. I feel completely rejuvinated in spirit and ready to bring life more abundantly to my world!!!

On Yom Kippur, Jews do a couple of very important things. To sum it up in my own way, on Yom Kippur, Jews fast, reflect, repent, remember, and pray while wearing white. What is so great about failure? More than any other time of year, the nature of human nature and its erroneous ways is exposed. What is so great and important about that? Because it opens the doors for divine remembrance.

The failure of human nature is the victory of divine nature! Making mistakes is a very important part of human nature. What are mistakes? Anything we consider to be negative about our life. It could be the things about you that rub people the wrong way. It could be the things about you that self-sabotage your life. It could be an illness or setback. It could be any pattern of failure, any small kink in your way of approaching life that seems to keep success at bay. Each of these phenomena are extremely important.

Mistakes, from the perspective of the soul, are like the process of “exhaling.” Inspiration is an inhalation process, receiving the divine spirit from above, then guess what – it is meaningless unless it is applied in the world. The process of application is not unlike a toddler learning to walk: the growth is in the tumble, not the steps. For human nature, too, any failure or breakdown is a sign of progress, and an opening in consciousness, as well as a crack in the the physical body that allows divine nature more sovereignty.

What is meant by “a Crack?” Human nature inextricably finds its origin in divine nature. Physically speaking, the process we call “learning” happens when the brain manufactures synapses and new connections between synapses. The ideal state of soul integration in the body would be when the synapse connections stemming from the autonomic nervous system have a full and complete pathway to every little cell of the human body. It is thanks to the presence of the soul and the energy that the Divine provides, that all ANS functions of the brain, heart, etc. can function.  Every time a toddler falls, a crack happens in the synapses of the brain and the openings provided by that breaking point become the basis for new connections.  Without exhaling, inhaling is no longer possible at a certain point. When the soul is flowing strongly into the body, one can sometimes “hear” a large procession of “crackling sounds” as the synapse connections are infused with greater spiritual capacity. Without failure, learning is no longer possible at a certain point.

The soul “breathes” into the body through the crown. Imagine you invented an incredibly complex series of gears that gets its power from above like a waterfall (i.e. The wheels depicted in Ezekiel). In order for the soul to operate well, you need 2 things:

1. The presence of the soul to provide the movement of “water” from the crest of the waterfall to the base.  The faster, more voluminous and wider head the flow has, the more gears it can turn.
2. Highly responsive junction points between all the different wheels of the gears so that the flow of inspiration can reach all the down from our minds to our fingers and toes, to our families, communities and work places.

Human nature inextricably finds its origin in divine nature.  Yet the divine in you needs to be invited back in to regain its sovereignty over all the processes of your life.  When your own soul is completely in control of your life, then you are in a state of grace.  How can we get back to such grace???  Through the process of divine remembrance.

Divine remembrance has been built into life processes at every level.  Divine remembrance, divine grace, can be entered into by any one of trillions of “doors” that have been built into the system including:

• Any physical sensation
• One-pointed concentration on any task spiritual, mental or physical
• Noticing desire before it manifests
• Choosing to “see” the good in oneself and others no matter what
• Mirroring the behaviorism and nuances of others.  This practice requires one to study people like a book, and receive them fully by meeting people where they are.  It is very important to relate to people on their own level.
• Noticing the color white wherever it appears.
• Reflecting on mistakes and experiencing them wholeheartedly.

Why is it so important to experience mistakes wholeheartedly??  On a physical level, the one who fails a 1000 times a day will be 1000 times more successful than someone who only fails once a day!!!  Some people have such an idealistic image of themselves that they are afraid to commit to error.  This is a huge folly.  Personally, I crave the experience of failure because I can literally feel my soul, the current of breath moving from above grow in volume, size and strength each and every time.  Spiritually, making mistakes is 100% completely intentional.  In this very moment, your soul is engineering every aspect of your future in ways your physical senses can never comprehend. Why is your soul including mistakes in this design for your future??  Because mistakes are the opening for divine remembrance, the return to grace.

How does this process of engineering failure work?  Imagine this moment was like the first moment of creation, the big bang.  Physically, 1 second is composed of 1 billion nanoseconds.  In each of these nanoseconds, on a quantum level, the soul has injected a single seed-like impulse made of building blocks in spiritual world called lifetrons.  Lifetrons are like “cells,” they are most basic building materials of living spiritual substances.  Creativity in any field of endeavor will be completely fruitless unless we can somehow mirror or produce in harmony with the design of life.  In a very literal way, the second that just passed was like a big bang – composed of a billion lifetrons that were “planted” i.e. injected into your life through the current of the soul via the autonomic nervous system (ANS).   What happens next is a process of unpacking the data, firstly interpreted by the endocrine system then output as biochemical chain reactions that are then interpreted by the sympathetic, sensory-based, nervous system (SNS).   In such a way, this one second has unpacked one billion lifetrons that will become your life a few days or a year from now.

It has been scientifically proven that the sensory places of the brain “see”  such kinds of impressions born from the world of the soul first before the world of matter.  For instance, if I say the word “dog,” an image or associate with the animal appears in your mind even I haven’t shown you a picture.  Plato‘s allegory of the cave is in many ways a depiction of this process.  To Plato, what the sympathetic nervous system “sees” are the shadows on the wall cast by the light of spirit through the aperture of the SNS.  To the ancient rabbinical technology, these impressions are called “dust,” and the same exact metaphor is used in Buddhist spiritual technology as well.   A person who lives based on sensory-based information alone, for example, is said to slither on their belly through life and eat of dust.

A living soul eats not dust, but rather breathes the light of heaven and eats the bread of soul consciousness and drinks the waters of divine energy.  For the soul to be fully integrated so much into the body that they live in “reality,” is the essence of the divine plan and human evolution.  However, the process of divine remembrance is built into this seed-pod of a billion lifetrons that was just now released into your body by your soul.  Why are mistakes designed into the system?   These mistakes are like cracks that God can use to re-enter and reclaim his creation.

Unlike sensory human awareness, the soul does “see,” perceive, every aspect of the sum total of possible information available in all ranges of electromagnetic frequency.  Light, sound, emotion, all knowledges, bodies of science, akashic records, the goddess library and all celestial resources including divine light, sound and healing are all present and available.  In this moment, the spiritual technology of remembrance is administered by the seed-pod that was just released, as some kind of process of failure.

To understand why this process is so important to the soul, imagine you were a landlord of a vast series of homes. The laws of the world you live say that the rightful owner of any house will know the way in no matter what. All potential homeowners in this world are keenly aware of this law and construct every “brick” (i.e.) lifetron with a backdoor, that is a way in that is only known to them. Now imagine you have this amazing house that you have built and are ready to go off to work one day, but just realize you forgot your keys. You go back to the house to get your keys but find it locked. According to the laws of your land, you are only the rightful owner of the house if you know all the ways in.  The owner of the house first goes to the front door, then to the second most obvious door and so on until full entry is regained.    Our “houses,” “body temples,” our lives are intricately designed so that no matter how dormant, dark, unattended or illegally occupied they may be, the owner of the house, that is God, will always have a way back in.

The house your soul has built includes a re-entry system based on the failure of human nature. These re-entry systems are what ancient rabbinical technology called a ringlet. A ringlet, in my view, is a door for divine nature to re-enter the system. What is a ringlet? A ringlet is a series of experiences that carrying a common theme of failure on every possible plane of existence. Have you noticed that failures in your life happen in patterns? No matter where you go, you cannot run away from a ringlet. The only way through the ringlet is divine remembrance.

Ringlets, in the world of the soul, are considered fail-safe or fail-proof points where divine remembrance must be triggered.  Ringlets are fail-proof because they cannot be escaped.  Wherever you go, there will be some alternate version of the pattern manifesting itself, and yet it is for a extremely important reason. The purpose for ringlets. The purpose of self-sabotage. The purpose for failure of any kind is one and the same: divine remembrance.

If you knew that any failure that has ever befallen a human being has been specifically engineered as an instrument of divine remembrance, what would you remember? The seed-pod released by this moment will become your life tomorrow or in a week, and born within it is an impassable road block. There is only one way through: Upon this road block is a large sign that reads “Only Gods past this point.”

Related articles

• Al Chet (bokertov.typepad.com)
• Kabbalah: Yom Kippur – Mystical Union (blogcritics.org)
• Yom Kippur mp3s that changed the day, and hopefully the year (baalteshuvablog.wordpress.com)
• Post Yom Kippur – Halting Thoughts (sporadicintelligence.wordpress.com)

1. Why did God create the physical world?
2. Why did you choose to come to earth?
3. What truths or virtues do you rest in most easily?
4. In whose name have you come?

This story was written in 1990, preserved by my godmother to whom I gave it as a gift. A greater gift is to get it back 20 years later!!!. Thank you Caroline!!!!

The Golden Crane

As the bell rang its call of freedom, hallways were suddenly filled with the sounds of bustling kids finally on their way home. One particular group of boys walked especially slow in the passing herd, just waiting for someone to make a wrong move and say something to them.

Gathering his books and saying good-bye’s, Jimmy shouldered his backpack, started out the classroom door and paused, gazing beyond. Off in the distance, a deep orange sun was just creeping above the hilltops, filtering life into the sky. Overhead, a magnificent crane soared in the heavens, his great blue wing-tips expanding and rising in the wind. Freedom sparkles danced in the infinite sky growing larger and expanding until there was only shimmering golden-yellow that filled him inside and out.

Soon, a pale white hue formed the shapes of lockers and passing figures against the endless ocean of gold pounding to the beat of his heart. Jimmy looked around, and stepped through the door into the hallway outside. Passing many classrooms and faces, he wandered on his way home. Looking up in the trees and watching the leaves make patterns against the blue up above, Jimmy noticed a menacing pair of eyes gazing at him in the distance up ahead.

Suddenly, adrenaline raced through his body and his heart began pounding wildly in his chest as Jimmy cautiously continued on. By the time he could make out the figures, Jimmy was breathing heavily; the hair rose on the back of his neck and he slowed down, muscles tensed, just a few steps before reaching them.

Three figures leaning against the wall looked at him as if taunting him to come closer, eyes boring through him as Jimmy approached their corner.

The two guys on the end were about the same size and they both had a wicked smirk on their face; the guy in the middle was the biggest, looking down at Jimmy with crossed eyebrows.

The streets were silent; there was no one else around.

Jimmy felt a fear well-up in his chest that he had never known before and his stomach turned as he looked around, confirming his solitude.

“You got a problem!!” One of them suddenly shouted, boldly cocking his head and making a face. Jimmy stopped in his tracks.

“Where do you think you’re going!!” Another taunted. Looking off into space, heart pounding out of his chest, Jimmy declared fatal silence.

“What do you think you’re doing!!” The biggest one said, angrier now than ever. “I’m , Jimmy managed to say, but nothing else would come out. “What are you gonna do?!” He said, yelling now.

Suddenly, the figures before him started to fade away and Jimmy thought he was going to pass out in fear. Waiting to drop, he looked around and Jimmy thought he saw a golden tint surround the trees and fill the sky; fear dropped away from his side. An unfamiliar power welled up within, filling Jimmy with an inner strength, expanding outside and around his body. Although his eyes were open, Jimmy was blinded by a golden light.

“I’m—…”, Jimmy startled himself. The words came out clear and powerful in golden flow, weaved with the blue of a crane in flight. Peace filled his heart with tingles as he spoke.

“I’m not going to fight you.”

Just then a school police car skidded to a halt on their corner and the three guys were gone in a blur of madness. The big guy lost a shred of his jeans jumping over a fence as they disappeared into the city.

Jimmy stood motionless, staring into the sky as the police car drove away. Way up high, he could barely make out the blue wing-tips of a crane in flight as Jimmy took a deep breath, and continued his journey home.

Why am I writing Bible Stories?  Like any good Jew, I answer a question with a question!

Have you ever had a dream where you were naked?

For myself, those dreams were usually in the context of school.  I was participating in class, then I happen to look down and BAM! I suddenly realize that I forgot to get dressed!  I’m sure everyone has had at least one dream like this in their life.  I could never really understand this type of dream.  The idea of forgetting always seemed to be at the forefront, and I would wake up with thoughts like, “How could I forget to do something so simple as get dressed?”  Yet forgetting didn’t completely make sense because usually it is only when one looks at themselves they realize they were naked.  Any reaction by the people in the dream, if at all, comes after the fact of realizing.

In mid-August of 2010, I experienced the first of several kundalini openings in my spine.  These openings in the core of my being have continued almost like clockwork, every two months since, always occurring in the middle part of every alternating month.  The first opening came from the sacrum, moving into the heart.  The next came from the heart, moving through the neck, approaching the crown, and so on.

There are many ways to try and describe what is happening, they are mostly metaphorical.  The experience is that my soul is much more tightly integrated with my body.  The most dramatic, literally, affect of this change has been a radical connecting of my voice and my true self.  Put simply, I found my voice and whatsoever is true and sincere of me comes out – for good or for ill.

Luke 12 contains the following portion:

“There is nothing concealed that will not be disclosed, or hidden that will not be made known. What you have whispered … will be proclaimed from the rooftops.”

What if your soul came through your own voice and you had no ability to “turn it off” anymore?  These expressions are like a double-edged sword: on one hand celebratory and inspirational integrating that of the soul into everyday living.  One the other hand, they reveal that which is of weakness and of shadow within me all the more readily.   In other words, in an emotional and spiritual sense my nakedness was somehow made permanent: I can’t help but be who I am and have no desire to “clothe” it in any other way.

One of the epistles states:

Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”- 2 Corinthians 12:9,10

I’ve never really been a lover of the Bible.  Like most people, I mostly despised the hypocrisies contained therein and the high-and-mighty way that people use the Bible to put each other down at best and commit genocide at worst. True to the way of the scribe, I can’t help but rewrite the above passage in way that is true of me:

Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so the power of the soul may live through me.  As a living soul I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. The warm winds of rebuke feel like food to my soul.  The hot fire of failure fuels the light of my soul.  For when I fail, then I am strong in spirit and walk through its open door to redemption. Therefore I sing the song of my soul without fear, that when my mouth closeth I finally know complete rest in the the kind of silence that is one with the Father within.

If this isn’t radical nakedness, I don’t know what is.  In choosing this way of life described above, both the incredible love of who I am and the shadows I carry are perhaps equally proclaimed by the rooftops of my own expressions. In the story of Adam and Eve, the dynamic duo are depicted as happily naked in their original state, and only “clothed themselves” after being influenced by however way one would interpret the fall of man.

Nakedness.  I have finally found a metaphor that I can connect 100% with my life.  Amazingly, this metaphor is also in the Bible.

Radical Self-Disclosure.  Hmm… perhaps this is a step towards Christ-consciousness. It certainly forces one to grow faster!!!  If I can’t hide my nakedness anymore, if my heart is constantly being shouted from the rooftops of my own voice – I’d better just busy accepting it and doing the work required to make that which can no longer be hidden become functionally integrated just as well!  Amazingly, this metaphor is also in the Bible.

Acceptance.  Acceptance and loving myself for who I am.  What a gift that is!!  The greatest gift of shouting what’s hidden in the heart continuously is the gift of, perhaps for the first time, finding love for all that is good and all that is bad within oneself.

In the process of being unable to not speak my own heart, radical honesty is thus elicited from others as well – and just like my own it is not always kind.  One of the most challenging accusations that have come back is that I must have some kind of messianic complex to be speaking, acting and writing the way I do.  I’m continually reflecting on this accusation, and the fruits of those reflections in part are the reason for writing this story.

Each morning beckons like the rising sun, accepting myself as I am & finding greater ability to express love more deeply and fully.  Perhaps in accepting myself more fully, it is only natural to more fully accept and love other people as well. Sometimes I feel so hopelessly in love with everyone I see, I can’t help but smile like an idiot!!  I call this my “friendly face meditation.”  But what happens when my ability to love others exceeds their ability to love themselves?

What is a messiah?  What if the one who was known as Yeshua simply was just an incredibly loving, truthful man and no one could really handle it?  If this was true then it would make sense that half the people who couldn’t handle it wanted to worship him and the other half wanted to destroy and silence him.  What if all Yeshua wanted was for people to love themselves they way he loved himself and others?  What if those healed by faith were those few lucky ones simply able to find naked compassion for themselves?

What if the story of the Bible is simply a story of awakening available to anyone?  What if the Bible were simply a celebration of what it means to be a human being?  What if worshiping anyone or anything were simply an obstacle to getting on with the business of becoming divine?    What if those moments of shadow were simply a forgetting to love myself and others?  Such a love simply needs to be given first place above all that seeking to be born out of the abundance of my heart!  If those are both true, then naked compassion for oneself and others could never be evidence of forgetfulness, but rather evidence of remembrance.

What if?  What if? These kinds of questions, combined with my experiences in dreams metaphorically applied to my living, have resulted in this quest which I have named “The Book of Redemption.” Questions are so amazing!

If knowing that you do you not know is the beginning of wisdom, then questions are like an open door to a new world.  The Quest is contained in the question. The question is a journey for which destinations are only temporary. Its complete answer can never arrive, but only deepen in unfolding like another signpost on the way.

This is the essential antidote to any doubts.  Questions are “anti-doubts” because when one asks anything with a sincere and open heart, the door is opened and the answer comes not by grasping some kind of answer, pulling it from the other side,  but by walking through the door yourself!

Good questions are the doors to eternity!!!  Can a “good priest,” a “good Rabbi, a “good Jew,” “good Christian,” “good Muslim,” “good American,” “good man or woman” or a “good consultant” ever celebrate the fruits of not-knowing?  Certainly any “good Messiah” wouldn’t be entitled!! In what context can good questions really be celebrated for what they are?

Related to the Bible, I believe there is no document more grossly misused or misunderstood.  What a perfect source of spiritual nutrition to exercise the art of good questions!!!  This story is the fruit born from walking through one such door after another.

To the question of messianic complex, I answer with a prayer:  “May all who dare to live fully in love be neither worshiped nor destroyed.”

To you I extend an invitation through an open door.  I invite you, not into an answer, but into a journey – the journey of good questions. The answers will never come to you.  You must yourself go through the door and see what you have become.

Every world, every dream, every reality is based on a vibration.  No vibration, no reality.  Change vibration, change reality.  This can be demonstrated using sound being projected through a medium, the field of cymatics.  Please watch this 2 minute video and see if you can count how many “realities” these particles organize themselves into:

I count 15 realities, each one more complex and dynamic than the former, each one resting on the foundation of and materials of the former reality, each one tuned to a more refined vibration than the former.  In between each reality I saw scattering disorganization as the former dissolved into the new.

End Game – The Book of Redemption

A Retelling of the Bible from the Perspective of a Lucid Dreamer

By AJNA The Scribe

Prologue

THE SEED

When a seed is born, it peers only into uncertainty and darkness.

“Which way do I grow? I only get one shot at this.

My substance cannot go far before it is expired, and I must find IT – that thing. I must find IT.”

And so the little seed leaves its shelled home, its eye peering always forward –

Not knowing if forward be up or down, or into stone beside.

Undulating, imperceptibly undulating, a secret destination is plotted.

No one sees the single step, the wave-life, wave-like rocking gently back and forth,

ever forward – praying that forward finds IT.

Undulating waves grow stronger and longer and taller,

Now a gentle hint of green can be seen from my body in preparation to receive that which I seek,

Preparing me for my true life purpose, unknown, yet emanating

Respirating even in darkness.

Finally!! I can see!!  Here, in a new unknown, that feels so much like home

And my heart sings, “In the light, all love is found!”

Introduction

This book is a work of fiction, but a work of fiction written by a lucid dreamer.  What is fact or fiction to one who has dreamt lucidly for 30 years?  How many lives, how many stories redeemed?  How many characters has he lived as and applied their lessons to his living in the “real world?”

Where in your body do you reside?  One year ago, the experience of the physical body has shifted dramatically for the author.  Just as the poem, “The Seed,” above, seemingly a seed had burst in the sacrum of the spine and began a new journey up the spinal column, seeking the light visible from its “soils,” seeking a resting place, perfectly breathing the light visible from the above the crown of the head.

The human body has 5 spines, each a perfect replica of and higher vibration than the other.  These are: the sacral spine, lumbar spine, thoracic spine, cervical spine, and that most subtle body residing above the crown of the head.  Between each “spine” are 7 “seals,” gatekeepers who hold the seed until it has enough energy to “burst” again.  During the process of the seed ascending this tower, many more “births” and “deaths” continue to unfold.  Is there any difference to a dream?  No, lucid dream training is the perfect preparation for such a journey.

What does this mean?  A kundalini awakening?  Enlightenment?  The birth of a messiah?  None of these hold any meaning for the author!!!  They are just words, words with no meaning.  For a lucid dreamer, who has experienced living personally in thousands of dream-births and dream-deaths, it is simply a natural progression of growth available to any dreamer on THE WAY.  Dreamers assist each other best by simply telling their stories, and reflecting aloud on their experiences.

The author was born into a Tri-lingual Jewish family, and exposed over time to a buffet of spiritual philosophies and practices.  What did the Bible represent to a Jewish kid?  Dinners with family, meals that retell stories and the proud history of a people in love with God.  It meant dancing, Israeli folkdance camps, and the source of inspiration for the songs that gave identity to a nation.  And yet that nation was built on the rubble of a people who, too, have a story.  If the death of a civilization is tragic, even more devastating is the death of their story.

Since that fateful day a year ago, sleeping dreams come less and less.  Those that do are incredibly flexible in the identity of the dreamer.  When a lucid dreamer visits the ocean, he experiences the scene from the perspective of the waves, of the cliffs, of the sunlight.  Each of those players in the dream has its own journey, its own hopes and aspirations and the dreamer “moves through” each of their identities with ease.  What is waking life to such a person?

What does the Bible represent to a lucid dreamer?  Perhaps it represents a world dream.    Each of the players of the story represent an aspect of consciousness, each of the stories represent a movement of life, perhaps in one’s body.  The Bible is the story of each our cells discovering who they are and starting to wake up and work together.  This book is an attempt of the author to “see” through the eyes of each of most resonant characters and uncover that which is relevant to him.

How is time reflected or represented in a dream?  Things jump around and sometimes dreams are contained within dreams.  The Bible is the same.  Everything is modeled on a pattern of the number 7.  That being said, the author is not a Rabbi nor a biblical scholar but simply telling a story and just like any other endeavor, learning as he goes!

How is growth reflected in a dream?  Shake a pound of salt on a sound table and see how it behaves in increasing frequency and amplitude.  This is the field known as cymatics.  Vibration causes seemingly inanimate media to come alive in flowering, mandala-like patterns. The higher the frequency and amplitude the more complex the structure becomes.  In between each “expression” of the structure there are periods of disorganization.  This method of growth is not unlike the development of a zygote: an embryonic miniature replica that would eventually express itself as a living, breathing unit of consciousness that we call ourselves as individuals.  Could the body of humanity, too, be a zygote of something greater?

This story is just that – a story, but hopefully it will be a story celebrating what it really means to be a human being.  The story seeks not to glorify any particular person, least of all the author!  The story seeks not to vilify any particular person or group as well and enters into the project with the premise that all the characters on stage are a part of each of us, in consciousness, animated like the salt on the cymatic table that we call life.

Where have we come from?  Who are we?  Where are we going?  These are the ultimate questions that mythology bursts forth to answer.  The quality of the story is a seed for the quality of life for the one asking.  Perhaps all mythologies relate to each other and the huge pantheon of possible characters, too, represent each of the cells of the body of human consciousness on more subtle planes.

What does it really mean to be a human being?  Where is the limit of human potential?  If this story serves to push the bar of that limit to any degree, then the book has succeeded in an act of redemption.